Slow Down Tiger, You're Slobbering

Talk to Big Tongue and Gloves. Barbershop calls about 12 times but I don’t answer.

Big Tongue comes over to watch movies. We order pizza. He’s cool. Cuter than his online picture and super sweet. I can tell he’s digging on me. And I think, hey, this guy is really something. Plus he’s looking to actually settle down and that could be a nice change for me. When the movie is done we talk for awhile. He asks if he can kiss me. I’m giddy with anticipation. A sweet kiss on the lips. Nice. Then the ear and neck. Hello, Tiger. Then he comes in for the kill. And kill it he does. Not only is his tongue nearly choking me it’s so down my throat, but he’s like slobbering all over my face. I have pools of drool running from his mouth to mine. Swapping spit, literally. Dude, swallow!!! I’m almost gagging. I have to pull back. The mood is gone. I dodge his kisses for another hour as we talk and then start the obvious yawn. I need to go suction my mouth and head to bed. He leaves and I do just that.