Somedays It Feels Like My Hearts In A Turbo Salad Spinner

The weekend went the same as many in the past. MNS telling me he is going to try to see me and not coming through. Spending my nights hanging out with my girls, Balls and his crew. Texts and calls with Random #1. Out of the blue calls from Dom and Rebound, which I don't answer. Mob calling just to hear my voice and tell me he loves me. Sunday night Marine calls and wants to hang out but I'm too tired and it's late.

I wake Monday morning to a text from MNS saying he has to go into work and can't come over. I'm not shocked. I'm not even sure if I'm that disappointed. I mean, I am, of course but it's become the norm and perhaps I'm getting a bit numb to it. Perhaps I'm getting a bit numb to him. Does this have anything to do with Random #1? A little bit, I'm sure. There is just no comparison in the way they treat me. So why do I still love MNS when he's such a fucking dillweed?

You know those stupid forwards you get on your phone now? As if those didn't annoy me enough in email and now they've found their way to my cell phone. Anyway, I have one in there that I read Monday morning. It says the following "Wait until you find a guy that calls you beautiful instead of hot or sexy. Who calls you back when you hang up on him. Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the person that kisses your forehead. Who wants to show you off to the world. Who holds your hand in front of their friends. Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much they love you and how lucky they are to have you. Wait for the one who turns to their friends and says "there's my baby". Wait for the one that's true to you." I read it a couple of times. MNS can hardly return a text, can't keep his word on anything, I haven't met his friends (minus the St. Patricks Day incident) or family and we don't share much of anything anymore. Yommey is the only one that's met MNS and all my friends want to get shirts that say MNS SUCKS and wear them to his softball games. If we were on a version of love survivor, it's pretty obvious which one they would vote off the island.