Define Exclusive

I take Von home in the morning and get ready for work. Filled Vagina Jane in on my previous night. She’s liking Von but still cautious. I don’t blame her. I’m waiting for something to go terribly awry as well. Von calls me on my way to work to tell me to have a good day and that he can’t wait to see me tonight. Am I on “Punk’d”? This guy is unreal.

Vagina Jane decides that we should venture out tonight. Von meets us at the bar. We drink and play darts and engage in an overabundance of public affection. We are the couple I used to make fun of and would tell to rent a room. Vagina Jane is still trying to find a crack in him. On the way back to my house she gives him the best friend-erly interrogation. He passes with flying colors. She’s stumped. We see CC at the gas station, even though when he left the bar he told us he was going straight home. He is clearly wasted so Vagina Jane and I convince him to let her drive him back to my house. I apologize to Von about Vagina Jane’s questioning. He says he doesn’t mind at all. In fact, he would be worried if the best friend didn’t care enough to do that. I think he should write a book and list the ways that he makes a woman feel like she’s the most amazing person on earth. I would buy it for every man I know so that other woman around the world could feel this wonderful. Yes, I’m a giver. Always sharing. Well, most of the time.

We tuck CC in on the couch and Vagina Jane leaves. Von and I get into bed and start talking. He says that he finally figured out what the catch is with me. This is one I’ve been told before. I have a lot of guy friends and it’s hard for some of my significant others to deal with. Especially because I am such an affectionate person, always greeting people with a hug and a kiss. My heart drops. I’ve been in this conversation way too many times. More than one of my relationships has come to an end because of my male bonding abilities. We discuss it for awhile and Von is pretty cool about the situation. He says as long as he knows that I’m coming home with him he can deal with it. Which leads to a conversation about us and how fast things are moving and where we’re headed. Both of us feel like we’re riding a tidal wave. Neither of us want to jump out, despite what our heads are telling us to do. We decide that we don’t care about logic and we’re going to go with the flow and see what happens between us. We also decide that if we’re going to give it a go, we’re going to give it our all. It’s official: We are dating exclusively. Before we know it, it’s 5 o’clock in the morning and we’re still yapping away. Yapping turns to kissing which leads to mind blowing sex which eventually leads us to sleep. We have one hour before my alarm goes off.