Surprise, I Don't Love You

I was combing my hair this morning after Gloves left, thinking about our night, irritated out of my mind. Why do I let him irritate me? Because I’m a woman and I’m irrational and emotional. And what should I do about it? Well, small acts of revenge of course. I can’t physically hurt him. I’m not sure I could emotionally hurt him short of outing him to the other woman and never speaking to him again. Tempting, but not my style and I really don’t care quite that much. Then it hits me. His favorite thing to do to me. Well, besides that. Get your mind out of the gutter. He loves my hair. He loves running his fingers through it and playing with it. He comments about how I have such beautiful, long blonde hair. I head to Supercuts and go to town. Twenty minutes later I watch her sweep five inches of my golden locks off of the floor. It’s just the change I needed. I love it! It’s fresh and fun and new. Perfect.

Prince comes down and takes me to lunch. I can tell he got a hard on somewhere between the salad and the chicken. He then acts surprised when I call him on it. “How can you tell?” Um, hello, I was with you for almost a year. I think I know the signs of your arousal. As we drive back to my apartment I fear he is going to leap over and attack me. I haven’t seen him this hot and bothered in a long time. I look over and can see it through his jeans, creeping halfway down his thigh.

We get inside my house and he finally attacks. I think it must be my hot new haircut. Up in my room we take a romp. I always enjoy sex with Prince. It’s very business like but quite fulfilling. Today he apparently has a lot of pent-up hormones. Whereas usually I’m the one begging for round after round, today I have to cut him off and put him in time out. I told him I was tired and that we were only going to do it once. I even gave in and did it twice. But I was drawing the line when he came sniffing around for round three. I needed a nap if I was going to be able to go out tonight. Didn’t he understand that? Finally he realizes that I’m serious, pouting while he gets dressed and leaves me alone to my nap.

After my nap I jump in the shower. As I’m toweling off I hear my phone ringing. I run into the room and leap across the bed to answer it. Lo and fucking behold it’s MOB. He asks what I’m up to. Says he just got back in town and wants to see me. He’s already at the bar. I tell him I’ll be up later. He says he’s not sure how long he’ll be there. I tell him if he wants to see me so bad he’ll wait. If not, I’ll talk to him later. I hang up and see that I had missed two calls from him while I was in the shower as well. Damn, someone’s eager tonight.

I get ready and head to the bar. Asia is there. And MOB. I take a seat and he flashes me that frickin’ smile that I adore. He runs over and hugs me, almost knocking me off my stool, telling me how much he missed me, it’s so good to see me and how much he loves me. Whoa! Slow down, tiger. I haven’t even gotten my first drink yet. We go outside and talk for awhile. He fills me in on his trip to take care of his grandmother and how good it is to be back. He claims he missed me and thought about me every day. He loves me so much he could never explain it to me. Again, too little, too late. Luckily, Dorothy and Vagina Jane soon arrive. I think this would stop him but I’m so wrong. He instead tries to charm them, as he is so very good at. He also has no problem telling them how much he loves and misses me. At one point he tells Dorothy that he loves me and I’ll always be in his heart no matter what. She says, “Oh, you’re melting my heart.” I say, “You’re not melting mine so keep talking. And buy me a drink while you’re at it.” He does both.

After hours at my house. Baby Girl shows up with a bunch of people I don’t know. Dorothy runs off to entertain Sam for the night. Vagina Jane and Tiny Pop catch up on what the stars hold for each them in my new astrology book. MOB stands center stage in the kitchen entertaining all my guests. I watch from the couch. He does have a way with people. And he does know how to get them really hammered! Two bottles of liquor later it’s time for everyone to leave. Someone has managed to lock the downstairs bathroom from the inside and we’re locked out. Of course the hinges are on the inside as well. I’m too tired to deal. MOB goes outside to pee instead of using the upstairs bathroom. He’s getting to that drunk and belligerent stage I know too well and rather despise. I tell him I’ll drive him home when he gets done. But he doesn’t come back. I shut the doors and go to bed. I call him. “Where are you?”, I ask. “That’s a very good question.” All I want to know is if he’s safe. He says he’s at home. I hear a girls voice in the background. More than likely it’s his sister but I would rather pretend it’s the crazy bitch baby mama that I hate. It fuels my wanting to keep my distance. In a drunken slur he asks, “Why don’t you love me anymore?” I tell him “Because you don’t deserve my love.” I hang up and go to sleep.